Cherry's World | Roy Cherian Cherukarayil's Philosophical Literature, Visual Arts and Music: Parenting

Showing posts with label Parenting. Show all posts

Friday, January 30, 2026

PARENTING TIMES - FUNNY TWISTS - 4 - VINTAGE SWAGGER?

Our interactions with our children open up the gates to the understanding of our personality. This is another funny moment between the parent and the child and how the child perceives the personality of the parent.

The hubbub around the school was something I had already got used to over the many years that I had been there to pick up my daughter. The incessant honking of bikes, cars, school vans and school buses, slowly inching through the school road generated a special kind of sound effect for my ears. There were too many vehicles parked on either side of the road and many vendors on the pavements, selling their stuff to the students. This was the normal scene. The school road had a lovely canopy of trees, and one could never feel the heat of the day even during peak summer. Birds were pretty active on these and their droppings from such a height, created a music beat of a different style.

It was ten minutes to 3.00 pm and I was eagerly waiting for the school bell to ring. I was sporting my father’s dark vintage Ray Ban glasses with the pretty outdated rectangular frame. I had often wore this whenever I went to my daughter’s school, much to her disapproval. On most of the days, she would tell me jovially that it made me look much closer to a stern police officer’s profile, because I was already a person who by nature portrayed a very serious demeanour, most of the time. On the rare days when I was a shade jovial and relaxed with her, she would say with a laugh that the glasses made me look more like a Malayalam cinema villain. I must accept that I loved both these points coming as feedback although they were stated jovially. It unknowing brushed my big ego each time. I loved looking serious and this feedback only drove to be more so. But I had never been overt about this liking to anyone.

The school bell rang and I could hear the happy screams and banter of students erupt as they made their way out of the school premises slowly. A big bunch of students huddled right opposite to the school, around the bakery and the ice cream shop. It was the normal routine of a bunch of students. They enjoyed a quick time together before parting for the day to their homes or tuition centres.

I spotted my daughter step out of the gate. She waved and increased her pace as she walked towards me. I took her bag from her and as I turned to walk towards the car, she stopped me. “Appa (Her way of addressing me Dad in Malayalam), why don’t you walk with me to the other side of the gate. Some of my boy classmates are there waiting for their vehicles. They will get scared seeing you. It would be fun. Come on”, she laughed and tried to persuade me. This was nothing new. She persuaded me this way, every time I sported the vintage sunglasses. I would always refuse stating one reason or the other. But that day, I went along with her. Her boy classmates were taken by surprise and each one scampered into different directions and disappeared into the building again. I relished the moment. My daughter was also happy.

These funny moments happened a few more times in the following weeks and my daughter laughed to her heart’s content and it gave me a fine ego boost. I would call it the façade multiplier effect.

My daughter was a great admirer of my father. She would watch him in awe when he spoke over the phone or to a set of people who came whom especially when there was an issue that had to be addressed. “Appacha (Her way of addressing Grandpa in Malayalam) has that swagger. The way he takes decisions and backs it. He is great. The way he presents himself, there is a persona that fills the space and puts the people around in mode of attention and deep respect.” I think I would have heard her say this multiple times whenever we got a chance to discuss about him.

And then, I heard it one day from her. We were returning back from school and I was driving the car. “Appa, you missed scaring the boys today,” she said laughing. “I have told them that you would like to meet each one of them. They are really scared thinking about it,” she said laughing again. She was observing me closely whether I was in a fine and jovial mood. I was. “But Appa, you know that swagger that Appacha has. Only he has in our family. I mean this is even including our relatives. You don’t have it,” she laughed. “You are faking it well though,” she smiled with caution and laughed again. It actually jolted me inside in a very funny way though, as I never expected something of this type from her. We were in the middle of a traffic jam with vehicles honking around, but the jolt was such that I was numb to what was happening outside. This was like the straight opposite of the impression that she was triggering inside me whenever I wore my vintage glasses and walked around. It took time for me to come to terms with it but I told myself that I am not my father and neither is he the person that I am. We can always draw inspiration and try and emulate. But imitation can be the sincerest form of flattery. After a few minutes of silence she came up again. "Appa, you look handsome today," she said with a smile. She was making up. We laughed together as I drove forward.

You may also be interested in similar posts listed below:

https://cherryspace.blogspot.com/2019/02/parenting-times-funny-twists.html

https://cherryspace.blogspot.com/2019/05/parenting-times-funny-twists-2.html

https://cherryspace.blogspot.com/2025/02/parenting-times-funny-twists-3-all.html

FOR MY BOOKS, PLEASE VISIT THE LINKS BELOW (FREE ON KINDLE UNLIMITED):

POEMS OF LOST LOVE

Poetry book 'INDELIBLE ETERNAL ETCHINGS':

https://www.amazon.in/INDELIBLE-ETERNAL-ETCHINGS-emotions-unbridled-ebook/dp/B072J4L656/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=indelible+eternal+etchings&qid=1583428166&sr=8-1

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STORIES

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For other countries, please visit the respective Amazon sites.

Wednesday, March 3, 2021

UNSEEN TEARS

When the sun is up and in full cry,

And I play the tough role of a parent,

Sometimes being too protective

And sometimes chiding for crossing thresholds,

Often challenging the limits of our temperament,

We retire hurt and with thorns in our heart.

But when the moon and the stars shine,

And my little one has surrendered on sleep’s altar,

I kneel close to her bed

And watch her beautiful face as she sleeps.

Tears trickle down my cheeks,

As I realize that how much ever I parade,

Like a tough parent throwing my weight around,

I am still a slave in front of her,

Who never wants to hurt her or see her cry.

FOR MY WRITINGS, PLEASE VISIT THE LINKS BELOW (FREE ON KINDLE UNLIMITED):

POEMS OF LOST LOVE

Short Story book 'A PEARL FROM EVERY OYSTER':

https://notionpress.com/read/a-pearl-from-every-oyster

https://www.amazon.in/Pearl-Every-Oyster-Stories-Shorter/dp/1948473151/ref=sr_1_1?crid=3GI23X9JIKQGK&keywords=a+pearl+from+every+oyster&qid=1583428674&sprefix=A+Pearl+from%2Caps%2C302&sr=8-1

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For other countries, please visit the respective Amazon sites.

Thursday, February 25, 2021

SO NEAR YET SO FAR

When my daughter was pretty young, it had been easier to get her into a discussion with me, to play or to spend time over studies. The internet had not caught up then and chat machines and phones were not there. Once into her teens, her world became different, friends were anytime around on social media and chats and tastes and topics of a young adult like her became very different from mine. The Work From Home concept was not implemented then and although I had to travel about three and half hours everyday to office and back to home, I used to consciously find time on my return to spend with my daughter. I still found a way to connect with her through books, movies and songs.

With the coming of the coronavirus and the Work From Home concept, a lot changed. Extended hours of work and work calls kept me always glued to my laptop. When there were discussions in the family, she would voice out that the time I spent with her was pretty less. Yes, Work From Home has caused work to eat up a big part of my life. This has been so for more than a year.

Today, I consciously made some time during the lunch, tea and dinner sessions to watch a movie with my daughter. We had lots of things to talk, laugh and share and after a long time, I felt life was again smiling inside our home.

We had been so near to each other for more than a year but still felt as though we had been very far away. I realized that time management is going to be the key.

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Wednesday, April 17, 2019

PARENTING TIMES - FUNNY TWISTS-2 - TANTRUMS

Last weekend, I had the opportunity to visit my friend along with my wife. He had been calling me for a while to discuss some topics of common interest and so I found time for this, keeping aside my other weekend occupations. It was a good feeling to meet his family and his old parents. My wife had found time to talk to my friend’s wife after a long time, although they were school mates. I spent some time discussing our topics, one to one with my friend and then spent the rest talking to his father. My friend’s sister was there too along with her two sons. They had come down from Delhi to spend their holidays here. I shook hands with the boys and gave them warm hugs.

Both my friend and I were talking softly as we would do unless something put us into a tight spot. His father too was a soft spoken soul. I could hear the voices of the women talking. They were certainly much louder than the men but it sounded fine. But a few sounds were not bearable and were almost getting on my nerves more because I often found it difficult to remain calm in a noisy environment. There was a construction in process on the opposite side of the house and the abrasive metal grinding wheel was giving out its own distinct fired up cry. Two black ravens on a tree close to the window where we sat were desperately cawing taking turns as though practicing for a church cantata. A mobile tomato vendor found the tree next to the house window, a nice place to halt and sell his stuff, while his announcing system was dishing out repeatedly “Grab your tomatoes for a good price”. And if all this was not enough, the two little boys, my friend’s nephews, were creating a ruckus while grabbing and chasing each other while running around in the hall, all through spaces between the furniture and between where we sat.

I wanted to tell them to stay quiet as the overall cacophony was getting unbearable. My wife looked at me once a while with a smile, as she knew how I would take this. But the people at home were trying their best I think, although it appeared to me that there was not much they could do. “Hey devils, can u keep quiet?” was what I heard their mother shouting. Every person there took turns to give a rap on the backs of the boys as they ran past them. This was now becoming continuous and to me the family members appeared like a set of IPL cricket batsmen, swinging on all sides trying out different shots. Sometimes the raps were loud, but to me it seemed that all these were just giving them more energy for what they were doing. “It’s ok, children are like that always”, I politely compensated as a guest with a dash of love.

Moments later, I also thought that I should contribute to the chiding. But how could I? So I smiled and waved to one of the boys and he immediately stopped running and froze, possibly because he never thought that I would wave at him while the others were dishing out punishments. I took aim at him with my palm as though it was a pistol and then shook it once as though to communicate that I had shot him. He was quick and played the cricketing cut shot on the invisible bullet that came to him. And where did the bullet go now? Straight on to his grandpa sitting on his right. The boy was smart and after seeing the invisible bullet hit his grandpa, he quickly turned to me and bought up his right palm and covered his mouth in exclamation and looked at me :))

Now that communication was a question to me “Hey, you know what you have done?” :))

You may also be interested in similar posts listed below:

https://cherryspace.blogspot.com/2019/02/parenting-times-funny-twists.html

FOR MY BOOKS, PLEASE VISIT THE LINKS BELOW (FREE ON KINDLE UNLIMITED):

POEMS OF LOST LOVE

Sunday, February 17, 2019

PARENTING TIMES - FUNNY TWISTS-1- BEING ORGANIZED

Last Monday, my daughter was getting ready for college. Her absent-mindedness over the last few months had crept into my mind and I had got up early that day. This was to keep an eye and ensure that she had taken everything with her. It was also to keep reminding her on the ticking clock, so that our driver would not have to get into a psychopathic avatar while having to chase the college bus.

And last week, in addition to this confusion, it was only after she had left home in the car and crossed a few streets from our home did she realize that she was still wearing her home footwear :) So, like a great Dad, here I was, monitoring everything and reminding her constantly to leave on time.

After seeing her off, I rushed to dress up and get ready to board our company bus that stops a hundred metres away from home. I take a good eight minutes to reach the pickup point and I normally keep a few minutes as a buffer with me to spare. I finished breakfast, recited my prayers and then quickly grabbed my bag and ran down the first floor steps towards the gate. Suddenly, I felt great that my bag was considerably lighter. But then, I really stopped and thought about it. “How could it be this light?”. Ahh!! I had forgotten to keep my laptop in it :) I think here I proved to be more of a roll model than in being a role model :)